The Hathcocks

I got my ring 'inspected' last night. Thankfully I passed, and can keep it for another six months. Yeah, I have no idea what any of that means. All I know is that it came with a paper that must be signed every six months to ensure that the diamond stays...healthy? I've no clue, obviously.

I know that our love is sort of expressed by the very existence of this blog, but I want to write a few things in reference to love.

Actually, it's difficult to write about what I'm thinking right now. Brian's love for me has fulfilled my life in a way that can't really be explained or described. He is so completely wonderful, and though I'm not pretending to think that he's perfect in any way, his imperfections are exactly what I've always wanted/needed/hoped for. He is one of those people who constantly tries to better themselves, in order to be the most productive. At the same time, he enjoys life and wants to appreciate things fully. He loves God with his whole heart, while never professing to be a perfect Christian. There is no such thing as the "perfect Christian" because we are always working toward a better life in Christ. He's not into the cliché slogans or pop culture Christianity; he has a personal, private relationship with God and isn't swayed by what the world thinks he should be as a Christian. All the while, he connects with those who aren't Christians. He has friends who don't know God, and he lives his life to show kindness, caring, and genuineness. Brian is so smart, it's almost sick. He is quick and witty, and always knows exactly what to say. I love talking to him about anything, about everything...about nothing. He listens so well and cares deeply about my life. I could just write forever about the ways he has introduced joy into my life in areas that joy had never been. God has blessed this relationship, and I cannot thank Him enough for such happiness.

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Bottom Line: We are madly in love and I am so happy.

Posted by Lindsey at 05:15 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

To clarify a point Lindsey made in her post yesterday, my mother went shopping with her sister Lisa and their friend Sharon. My mom bought two dresses. She told me that she hasn't bought a dress in fifteen years.

Afterward, they drove to the house we're to rent. A couple of guys were there, working on something. Mom told them who she is and the guys told them to come on in. Mrs. Burris soon came over and they all spoke about things. The small utility room was found to have some bad areas in the floor, and she's going to have it fixed before we move in. Uncle Bobby (Lisa's husband) may even do the job. I was glad to hear that, because he was laid off not long ago and any extra money for them would be nice.

The ladies liked the house. It's not big or fancy, just two bedrooms and one small bathroom. But, the location and neighborhood are great. We may only be there 6-12 months anyway.

Carlyn and I played basketball a lot today, at least an hour's worth. We played Horse and "School," which some may recognize as "Around the World." I'm including this in our wedding journal because time with family before a marriage is important. Things are about to change a lot in some ways. I won't be living at home and therefore won't see my brother every day like I do now, and have done since October 2, 1990.

We used to play basketball frequently, five or six days of the week during some stretches. I remember when he was very little and couldn't even toss the ball more than three feet over his head. Now he beats me half the time. (He would probably say more than half, which may be right.)

Tonight was the yearly celebration of Papa's birthday at Rocky River Springs Fish House. You can read a little about last year's get-together here. I think this was one of our biggest turnouts. I counted thirty people at one point, and I think a couple more squeezed in after that. It was great. I sat in front of Jeremy (my cousin, the first grandchild, five months older than me). Lucy (Jeremy and Amanda's daughter—their first child) was wide-eyed and smiling a lot. I don't see Jeremy much, and he's practically my favorite cousin, so it was great to catch up. I don't think he'll be able to come to the wedding, which is very disappointing. Everyone else seems to be able to make it. James Morgan said that he and Myrtle may come, also. James is my great-uncle, my grandma's brother.

I want Papa to be my best man, but he's 78 now and just having him at the wedding is a great thing. From what I'm told, traveling when you're old is more likely to be an ordeal. So, I'm just going to continue hoping that he'll be there, at least. If he agrees to be my best man, he may have to sit during the ceremony. I'll walk to him to get the rings. I really want him to be my best man, whatever it takes.

Anyway! During the "party" I thought about how this will be the last time the majority of my extended family will be assembled in one place before my life takes a big turn. I'm sad that Grandma left us so early, and that Uncle Charlie, Uncle Carl, and Aunt Doris are gone, too. I miss my grandmother more than I let myself know. If she hadn't died when she did, she would probably still be here now. My life would've been a lot different. I would've had her to talk with when I was going through adolescence and throughout college. There were times when I needed her badly. The same goes for my other grandma. They both died in the same year, 1994; February 15 for Grandma Hancock and October 18 for Grandma Hathcock. I miss them terribly. That also helps me to appreciate that I still have Papa. I'm so thankful for that.

I'm also thankful to have Gammy in my life. (For those unfamiliar with our families who may read this "blog," Gammy is Lindsey's grandmother on her father's side.) With her generosity and sweet disposition she reminds me of my grandmothers. I remember the first time I went into Gammy's house. I remember thinking, "This looks and feels like a 'Grandma House'." And after I got to know Gammy a little better, I thought, "She feels like a Grandma." She is my Grandma. I love you, Gammy.

That goes for all you Proctors! I love you guys.

Part of me feels bad that Bud (Mr. Proctor, Lindsey's father) can't pass along his name through a son. Yeah, I know that has nothing to do with me, technically, but still. He can't help that he's daughtered out.

I know I'm rambling, but it's late and I'm tired. And you know what? Sometimes within babble can be found some of the best stuff.

I love you, Lindsey. You're one of the best persons I've known. I know that my grandmothers would be proud that I've found such a great girl with whom to spend my life. I wish you could have known them. Since I know they would, and since they're unable to, I can say that they love you.

Posted by Brian at 12:30 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

We got up really early. Brian was in a really good mood, and we didn't even stop to eat breakfast. We left for the park a little before six, and it was still dark out. We watched the morning begin as we drove toward our spot. It was so nice. Early Saturday mornings are a really neat sort of quiet; slow to begin times. We arrived at the park probably around 7:35-ish. Brian wanted to walk on by the water, so we went down and saw the ducks. I think they might've been Canada geese, or some of them anyhow. It was truly a beautiful way to start October. Dew, cool air, and Brian's hand in mine.

We had to throw mangos, of course. They weren't really mangos, but that is what they were called a year ago, and I really can't think of a better name for them. They are these round-ish green things that fall from the trees in droves. Brian is a man, and he throws things in the water. It has always been his thing. Another 'thing' of his is watching me throw things. It is his thing because I am very bad, and he is always able to laugh a lot after my attempt. One time, I couldn't throw a rock out of a gazebo. I thought he was going to pee. So we held hands and threw mangos, and walked around, commenting on how great that little area would be for pretending to be in a war. The trees grow in little spurts around the walking path, and there is this one that is completely parallel to the ground at one point. It would be a nice battlefield. But it's not, for us. It is our spot that we loved together last year, and enjoyed immensely this morning.

After a while, Brian had to run to the car. My birthday is coming up in a few days, so I sort of figured that he was bringing something for me to celebrate turning 22. He came back with a plastic bag in his hand. Wal-mart, I think. He got me a new journal! I've been needing one, and this one says "Life" on it. It is my favorite color, in my favorite shade. It is lined, but they aren't too close together. He knew. He also got me a Kit-Kat bar. I don't eat much candy these days, but he knows that Kit-Kats are also a favorite. He just always knows. I love him.

After a while, we just sat and talked and looked at nature. The sun was making it's way up, and coming through the trees very nicely. Finally, we stood, and Brian hugged me for a long time. I will never forget that hug. His hugs are the best, and this one was very wonderful--I forgot all about the journal and nature and the water during this hug. While we were hugging, Brian asked me about how sure I am in wanting to be with him. I responded affirmatively. He asked if I wanted him to prove it to me. I said something along the lines of, "Brian, you know you don't have to prove it to me; I know!"

He said, "I know, but I want to prove it to you..." and bent down on one knee.

I know that his account of this talks about my garbled 'girl talk', and I have to admit, I can't even remember what was said. My eyes filled and my heart filled and my knees failed. He produced a beautiful ring out of his pocket, and I hugged him, sitting on his knee. I hugged and cried, and couldn't stop smiling. We kissed and smiled and looked around at the beautiful earth. My thoughts were faster than I can relay on here, but in general, they equate to, "I cannot believe that this amazing man wants to marry me, and I have never been more in love with anyone in my entire life and we Have to be together. Always."

We called my mom from the car, and looked at the clock to figure that it was around 8:03 AM when he asked me to be his wife. We had a romantic breakfast in a fastfood joint, and the rest of the day is a blur to me.

This love is so big. I can't believe I can have it. Thank you, God, for Brian. Thank you for everything. I don't deserve it, and will never take for granted the love you have allowed for me. I love you, Brian. I can't say how much. Thank you for a beautiful life, and I cannot wait to be your wife.

Posted by Lindsey at 10:04 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)