What a weekend. I spent who-knows-how-much on jewelry and various electronics. Seriously. Lindsey and I also went deep sea fishing before a meal in a you-can't-spend-less-than-$500-here restaurant overlooking the ocean. I have never touched so many diamonds or shook so many hands. What a world we live in.

Speaking of which, I bought a new camera. Finally. I have my new phone as well, so call me, everybody.

There are nineteen days between now and the wedding. I wish May 20 would get here; I'm tired of waiting. Everything is in place, as far as I'm concerned. Lindsey's mother seems a tad worried, but Lindsey tells me she would be no less worried if everything were perfectly tuned three years in advance with an infinite budget and a direct phone line to God. (I'm only kidding, of course. Kathy has been a huge help.) So, no worries! Everything is going to be fine and dandy. I need to arrange the music for the reception, finalize the vows, and maybe start work on the PowerPoint.

We are officially into "crunch time." This is it.

• Get married
• Nags Head
• finish organizing and setting up our house
• Visit Yorktown
• Two classes at Stanly
• The Dillards in July
• Go to Myrtle Beach with the my family and James'
• look for a better job
• Find Gary
• Try to make some progress with my writing projects
• Sleep (something I didn't get to do this school year)
• Check out Superman Returns, Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest, Clerks II, Talladega Nights
• take more pictures
• paint something (that actually looks good)
• fish

Don Corleone had it right when he said, "A man who doesn't spend time with his family can never be a real man." Although not exactly what I had in mind, the core principle is the same: family is one of the most important things in life. I love my [extended] family. Today we gathered at uncle James' house for fun and food. Josh, Jodi, Nathan, Jordan, Justin, Alexis, James, Cynthia, my parents, Cynthia's brother Ted and his family all piled in. Justin has bought Alexis a big trampoline, which is lined with a protective net to prevent clumsy boys like me from falling out. We flopped like manic fish for at least an hour, hitting and kicking a giant ball at each other. We were children tonight, and it was great.

I'm pleased that at twenty-four I still act like a child, or have the ability, anyway. I have lots of responsibilities, and even more now that I'm getting married. But I can still be silly and carefree. I see many, many adults who have let "the weight of the world" get to them. When one leaves childhood, he's a part of the "real world," and he sees things differently, usually without the curiosity and hope childhood allows. I'm going to do my best to hold on to that throughout my life. I think too many people lose it. (Let's see if I'm successful fifty years from now.)

Tonight was a reminder of that. It was probably the last time we'll have that sort of get-together before I'm married. I stopped looking at it that way, though. That makes it seem like something is ending and things will forever change, and that's not how it is. Things will still be the same, except that Lindsey will be a great addition, who will make things even better.

As I've written, midnight has come and gone, so 'today' has become yesterday. This is a special day, the day I first met Lindsey. We didn't officially start dating until the latter half of June, but I'm still reminded of her when May 7 comes. How would my life be different now if she hadn't bumped into me that day? A lot of people would say, "Oh man, I don't want to think about it." I do because it reminds me of how fortunate I am.

It seems as though I've always had problems with organized religion, even when I was small. I remember when I was little thinking how strange it was that everybody came and did the same things over and over in all the same ways every single time. Not to mention how incredibly boring it was. And church didn't even seem to be about love; it was about going through a routine, not breaking from it to talk about things, dressing up in acceptable ways, giving money, and trying not to offend old people by speaking your mind or asking questions. Meet for an hour, do these things, leave. What if I have a problem? Will all these people even care? The only time these things seemed to disappear in the least was around Christmas, which probably added to the joy of it.

(That, of course, is not the case everywhere. Some churches are worthy, with sincere people.)

I'm talking about this because Lindsey and I just found out that we are not allowed to dance during the reception at her church. Here is what we were written:

While dancing in and of itself is fine - the venue where it takes place is an issue.

About 4 years ago a wedding reception was held here and there were just a few dances - daughter and dad - son and mom - and it caused major problems among the membership.

You guys want to do more than that which would cause greater issues.

While we do not want to be legalistic - because the reception is being held here at the church we cannot be a stumbling block [to] others in faith.

Short answer - there can be no dancing bacause [sic] of the venue - we do [not] feel it would be appropriate.

Instantaneous headache, right?

The elders of the church do not want us to dance because the church "cannot be a stumbling block to others in faith." If dancing causes a problem for people and their faith, then they have much larger personal issues to deal with. The apologetic first sentence is virtually meaningless because of what follows. Anyway, I understand and agree that raunchy hip swaying, jiggling and jiving are not quite appropriate for this—and that's not what we want; there will be no junk shaking—but not even allowing the bride and groom's first dance? That is ridiculous. Father-daughter, mother-son, and the bride and groom's first dance caused major problems among the membership? [Contemplative, perplexed pause] That's the sort of info that makes people wish to never even go to your church—if you can't use some sense, and you just continue to loyally stick to crazy certitudes. Insane. Inane. Laughable. I've seen so many problems within churches. The church I attended as a youth split because of the purchase of new hymnals. It also experienced the same stupid division over a choir director. Other churches divide because of similar things, things that aren't important enough to cause such problems. Explain to me what is wrong with the father-daughter dance. Lindsey is going to dance with her father during her wedding reception. Thirty years from now I want her to think back on that moment and be happy. I will not let you take that away because of some silly restrictions.

Needless to say, we're moving the reception. We will not be controlled in this idiotic way on our wedding day. I will not let this irrationality represent me to my family and others visiting the church. Our wedding and the party afterward will be how we want them. I can see it now. "Watch out fellow Christianites, they're slow dancing!" [Woman's scream] [Several faint] "Run!"

I kill me.

Unless something crazy has happened, I'm in Virginia right now anxious as I've ever been, preparing to be married tomorrow afternoon. I decided this was a very appropriate time to publish my lifetime to-do list.

• Travel. I'd love to go everywhere, but I especially want to see:
  • As much of the US as possible, but particularly:
    • Alaska
    • New York
    • Pensacola again
    • Washington, D.C.
    • Boston
    • Los Angeles
  • Canada
  • Australia
  • England
  • Israel
  • South America
• Finish the book I've been trying to officially begin
• Learn to swim
• Go deep sea fishing
• Go on a serious road trip
• Grow a beard and leave it for a while
• Go to a drive-in movie
• Camp in a forest
• Donate money to worthy causes
• Build a house
• Compose my family tree
• Visit a prison
• Ride a horse
• Forgive the one person I've not
• Paint a decent picture
• Ride in a balloon
• Be the recepient of a surprise party
• Skydive
• Milk a cow
• Have children (?)
• Take some great photographs
• Spend at least 48 hours on an island
• Grow a garden like Papa had
• Walk the Great Wall of China
• Fill a scrapbook
• Throw a huge party and invite everyone
• Gain some true wisdom
• Go a month or more without eating meat

Lame, I know, but that's the way I do things.

There will be several scheduled posts while I'm away. I won't have access to the Internet for a while.

By now Lindsey and I are at Nags Head and we've been married for 24 hours. Praise God and thanks to everyone who made our wedding special. Yes, I'm writing this two months before yesterday even happened (starting to feel like Marty McFly here), but I know that even if aliens invade, gunmen arrive, or, God forbid, a dress strap breaks, it will have been a wonderful event simply because of what it is. Thank you, Proctors and everyone else in Poquoson, Yorktown, and the surrounding area who were involved, especially the members of Poquoson Baptist Church who welcomed me. I feel like I suddenly have a big new family. I've felt this way for nearly two years now, especially with Lindsey's immediately family. But now that it's official, well, it just feels great.

You've all been such a big help. Dee Forrest, Sylvia Wood, Sandra Lindell, Donny Goodrich, Bobbi Fordham, Pastor John, thank you for your cooperation and help. There were a few tough times, but we made it through.

Thank you, Kathy, for being a great mother-in-law. I don't know what's with all those rumors and jokes about mothers-in-law (Fred Flintstone just had a rare, unfortunate situation, apparently). You're great. That "in-law" part is negotiable.

Ashley, what can I say! You've always been very nice to me, right from the start. You're the closest thing I'll ever have to a real sister. Too bad I wasn't there to torture you as a child.

Bud, thank you for also being great. I remember when I first met you in KFC's parking lot in Albemarle. On that first day I could tell that you're a fantastic person and father. I look up to you, and not just because you're 6-foot-7.

I could never forget Gammy, who has become a grandmother to me. I lost both of my grandmas in 1994 and I've missed them a lot. You are a wonderful addition to my life and I love you, Gammy.

My biggest thanks goes, of course, to God. Without Him, Lindsey and I would never have met.

Lastly, but not quite least, Lindsey. Thank you for loving me and proving to me that there are some people out there worth risk; that things aren't as bad as all that; that I could find somebody worthy of love and who would echo it fully. You've loved me through all my bad times, when others would have left. You've helped me. You've probably saved my life, and only you can know what exactly I mean by that. To others wondering what that means and whether it's a cliché: it's closer to reality than rhetoric. Lindsey keeps me straight; "I walk the line." But enough with this talk! I love you, Lindsey. Let's start our life together.

Well, this is a great time to share with you Leo Kottke. Who, what, where, when, why? You can read about Leo Kottke here, and his Web site is here.

Since you probably didn't bother to click on those links—here, from the Wikipedia article:

Leo Kottke is a legendary acoustic guitar virtuoso who has developed a cult following of fellow guitarists and fans over the span of a 30-year career of recording and performing. Blending folk, jazz, and blues influences into a signature finger-picked style of syncopated, polyphonic music, Kottke's work pre-dated and predicted much of the New Age instrumental music movement, and is often considered part of the American Primitivism movement, partly because he was signed to John Fahey's Takoma Records label. Kottke has overcome a series of personal obstacles including partial deafness and a nearly career-ending bout with tendon damage to emerge as a widely-recognized master of his instrument.

I've gathered some of my favorites by Leo. They're available for download below. Have at it. I will ask, though, that you really give them a listen. His songs cannot be fully appreciated unless listened to entirely. They're not your average repetitive radio songs.

To save, Right-click and select "Save Target As..." or "Save Link As..."

1. Red & White (1:50)
2. Tiny Island (3:42)
3. Busted Bicycle (Live) (2:39)
4. Power Failure (2:25)
5. Hear the Wind Howl (Live) (3:11)
6. Eight Miles High (3:35)
7. Embryonic Journey (3:18)
8. Fisherman (Live) (2:43)
9. Buckaroo (2:04)
10. Middle of the Road (with Mike Gordon) (2:55)
11. Jambalaya (2:19)
12. Living in the Country (Live) (1:33)
13. Open Country Joy (Constant Traveler) (3:43)
14. I Am a Lonesome Fugitive (with Mike Gordon) (3:07)
15. World Turning (3:59)
16. Stealing (1:41)
17. Car Carrier Blues (with Mike Gordon) (3:50)
18. The Driving of the Year Nail (1:57)
19. Banks of Marble (with Iris Demet) (3:19)
20. Vaseline Machine Gun (3:11)
21. When Shrimps Learn To Whistle (3:33)

For convenience, if you'd like to download them all, here's a zip file.

And for a special treat, here is a taste of what Lindsey and I witnessed on November 13, 2004. This is part of what I recorded during the concert: Leo Kottke - Live at the Handlebar (Greenville, SC 11-13-04) (4:03). The quality is poor, sorry. It was a great thing to see him perform and then meet him afterward. You can read about that night here.

And for not having to clean up the church after our wedding. Get this: our parents not only paid for the wedding, but had to clean up after it, too. I hope I don't grow up to be a major league sucker like they.

We have entered Day Three of our honeymoon. Although tornados may have sucked us away to Oz by the time this post is magically published, it's probably safe to wager that we're enjoying our time in Nags Head. By now we've gorged on pizza, saltwater, and each other, and we're being lazy in the sun on the second story hammock.

It's time to tell you—I'm not coming back. Carlyn, take care of my cats; you can have my Star Wars figures and computer. Dad, Mom, thanks for raising me. I guess you guys may come visit sometime, if you want. If Jason ever tries to contact me again, give him back his Indiana Jones triology. He can keep Half-Life.