We can't stand a moment of silence when with other people, can we? I thought about that the other day while in class. Everyone says "um" or "uh" the second they don't know what to say. Why do we hate silence so much? Do people think it looks awkward when someone silently pauses? "The, uh, other day when I went to the store they had these, uh, little, um, grade fruit things..." What seems less intelligent, pausing quietly or muttering "uh, um" every 6 seconds? Why are there so many questions in this entry? Will you forgive me for its stupidity? Didn't you know that I ramble about strange thoughts I have even if they're irrelevant and insipid? Maybe we do it so no one will jump in and start talking. Nothing like that here. Please interrupt.
This entry is going to sound pathetic. What else is new, right? Sam and I had a bad night last night. The reason? My paranoia. I've never had a real girlfriend before. This relationship is something very new to me. When I think about her not being with me it tears me apart because we've grown so incredilbly close. I really do love her, and I dont know what I'll do if we're ever not together. I was crying last night while I was thinking about it and all. I guess I'm way too sensitive about things...I've always been that way. I talked with Bethany a lot today about it. She basically told me that since this isn't Sam's first relationship (well, it's her first "serious" relationship), she doesn't worry like me because she realizes my devotion. Since I have no prior experience to help guage things, it's easier to exaggerate things. I think that's about the way things are right now.
So, I apologize to you, Sam. You know that I love you. My problems with faith and trust aren't about you, but simply the uncertain.
This movie was very, very stupid; pretty silly; and hopelessly unique. I loved it; I needed some stupidity. Good God I love semicolons. Anywho, yeah, it was absurdly funny and I liked it .
I have to stop worrying about Sam breaking up with me. A few stupid things have happened lately, as you may know. It seems like I worry all the time. Even some scenes in this movie made me worry about losing her. I have to get a grip on my emotions and remind my heart that my brain still controls it. That doesn't accurately describe what I meant. Oh well.
You give brothers a microphone, and sooner or later they'll record this. It's bound to be universally true enough to be a theory, if not a law. The expulsion is mine, the exclamation is Carlyn.
We always assume we're smarter than we were. This proves us wrong.
Know what I mean?
